Saturday, April 6, 2013

in which we get a maddening letter from our insurance company

We had a distressing letter from our insurance broker about Slum and Blight yesterday.  About six weeks ago we had an insurance inspection and it took them this long to write to us.  We have two weeks to comply.  Of course they sent me a first draft of the compliance letter, which did not list the part about reshingling the outside of the building.

Totally paraphrased:

Dear Seth and Gregory:  In order to continue coverage on your building at #2 Cross Street, you must be in compliance with the following problems in the next two weeks.

1.  Dude, that oil tank is waaaaay too close to the furnace, and that cardboard on the walls??? Totally combustible.  (Really, you think if the oil furnace in the basement blows up that the damp cardboard will catch fire?....methinks the building is a gonner anyway)

2. Ummm, whats up with all that stuff in the basement surrounding the furnace...that has to go.  (OK, we have complied with this by getting the previous tenant out)

3.  Ewww, the outside of your building is gross and needs some new shingles or something to make it water tight and pretty.....(HA! Watertight?  Did you not see the holes in the roof!!)

4.  What's up with all the extension cords plugged into one outlet??  That shit has to be inspected.

So, they want the building reshingled, the furnace updated and moved, the wiring inspected and the damp cardboard removed from underneath the structure.  ALL IN TWO WEEKS!

Needless to say I asked for an extension...still waiting to hear.

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